Aug 26, 2015

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Have you ever found yourself on a family holiday, in a room full of distant relatives at Christmas, all eyes glued in excruciating silence on a How I Met Your Mother rerun, or at a gathering of people who can only get drunk if there are rules involved, thinking to yourself: Why, god, are there no decent board games in the world?

Here at Noisey we appreciate the value of PG-rated fun, we admire an activity that can get Grandma chuckling as hard as the kids, and we have a lot of respect for the lure of a traditional board game. That’s why we’ve created Guess Wu: the world’s first literal rap game. Beautifully illustrated by Dan Evans, Guess Wu is the two-player "mystery face" game that, inexplicably, nobody has invented until now. The concept is simple; it’s Guess Who?, only with Wu-Tang Clan members and affiliated artists, instead of some Leave It To Beaver-lookin’ randoms called “Maria” and “Alfred.”

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We might—MIGHT—give you the chance to win this cultural artifact in the near future. Until then, you can make your own by simply locating the childhood board game from your attic or local charity shop, crudely taping the words “GUESS WU” on the front, and drawing a spliff in the kid’s hand. Then, replace all the characters on the board with your favorite rappers using the cards above, and play on, playa!

If you’re not familiar with the rules, here’s how it goes...

CONTENTS
– 48 small pictures of Wu-Tang affiliated rappers
– 2 playing boards
– 1 supreme knowledge of hip-hop (not included)
– The only known copy of Once Upon A Time Shaolin (nah, we're f---ing with you).

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OBJECT OF THE GAME
Be the first to guess the identity of the mystery rapper on your opponent’s card.

GET READY TO GUESS WU
Before you play the game for the first time, take a moment, zen yourself, notice some of the differences between the faces on your playing board. Note the difference in full beards, slimline beards, and women. Maybe you could get your grandma to focus on the stitching of the hats; she'll like that. Be discerning.

PLAYING THE GAME
Whoever can rap all of “C.R.E.A.M” without stopping goes first, so that'll be your grandma. On your turn, you can ask one question to try to guess the identity of the rapper on your opponent's card through a process of elimination. The question you ask must be one that can be answered “yes” or “no.” To eliminate a card, simply flip its frame down and out of play. Take turns to ask one question each. In case you haven't caught on yet, we haven't veered too far away from Guess Who.

You can make it as easy or complex as you like depending on how well you know your Wu-ology.

REMEMBER!
If you think you know the identity of your opponent’s rapper, you may make a guess. But you must think first before you move! If your guess is wrong, you’ll lose the game as well as your street cred.

Hey! Are you a Wu-Tang fanatic or an actual member of the Clan? Is your Guess Wu style immensely strong and immune to nearly any weapon? Do you like the look of this game and think you can show us how to play it properly? Wanna try and win it? Shout at us on Twitter @NoiseyMusic.