i need some advice regarding my penis

Started by Mike Tyson, May 4, 2016, in Hall of Fame Add to Reading List

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  1. gavin
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    gavin albumdabster.com

    May 5, 2016
    Don't worry OP you're not a fa---- this problem has happened to all of us at one time or another, me personally I was 13 sitting on the bench in my tree house that my father had built me just 6 years before. There I was smacking my willy rapidly at the photo's in the magazine I had found under my uncle Daniels bed I am pretty sure it was a naked woman in the magazine but after seeing photos on the internet now days I am not completely sure but for the sake of semen and for emotional distress we will pretend it was a female I was jerking it to in that book.

    Then it happened, out of no where the mail man walked by he saw me in the tree house window looking at the magazine my arms flapping around like I was a chicken without a head just ready for that emotionless seed to drain from my young adolescent shaft. The mail-man quickly stumbled over to the ladder to the tree house climbing it skipping numerous steps on the way up just to get a peek at my goods.

    His eyes was closed when he entered the tree house, I guess he wanted to have the element of surprise and boy did he ever.. once opening the hatchet to my tree house the mail mans eyes widened like the sun in the summer, his mind must have been thinking a thousand things because he instantly picked up some of the colored pencils I had scattered throughout my tree house and started drawing on the shaft of my penis.

    I had told him to stop numerous times with no prevail there he was drawing, and drawing with no sign of stopping in sight surely enough 20 or 30 minutes had past and he finally quit his activities, after he was finished he put the colored pencils to the side licked his lips a couple times and marched his way back down the tree house ladder. I had peeked out the window to ensure he was gone before taking a gander at my genital region, surely enough.. IT WAS A CROWN EMOJI!! Oh this had me heated, I was shuttering through thousands of emotions I didn't know what to think either..
     
    Mar 28, 2024
  2. mee2

    mee2 Guest

    May 5, 2016
    real talk, your girl sounds like a dumbass. what sane person doesnt realise putting emojis on d-ck pics that are supposed to be immediately deleted post fap isn't a good idea. not only did she expose herself for being untrustworthy and keeping them, she also gives slight psycho vibes. she prob has a mike tyson d-ck shrine set up in the corner of her closet with hair strands and fingernail clippings. my advice, break up with her immediately, hit the gym and work on those biceps.
     
    #62
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  3. Famous
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    Famous Pablo Picasso

    May 5, 2016
    Beautiful Anecdote. 10/10 a must read
     
    #63
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  4. aquaberryares
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    aquaberryares one time I made sex

    May 5, 2016
    d--- I missed this thread and couldnt give bro advice on this earlier. Come on bro you should know what to do already. She blessed your penis with a crown, your d-ck is now royalty.

    The traditional thing to do would be to have her wear her nice panties before sex next time. Have her strip down to them, kneel down in front of you and bow hear head as you lightly touch your d-ck on her left shoulder, then her right and softly place on top of her head. If your penis is really king your ballsack should not be caressing her forehead at this point. You can give a small speech and make sure to place this song on cue. It is very key.

     
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  5. aquaberryares
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    aquaberryares one time I made sex

    May 5, 2016

    She is now knighted as your main b----
     
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  6. xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
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    May 5, 2016
    theres ur problem lmfao
     
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  7. Mike Tyson
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    Mike Tyson big cuntry's alias

    May 5, 2016
    f--- I'm dying :laff:
     
    #67
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  8. Runtown
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    Runtown lol

    May 5, 2016
    - gay people
     
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  9. Mike Tyson
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    Mike Tyson big cuntry's alias

    May 5, 2016
    Yo this thread just got way to real :lol6:
     
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  10. pHiLLip fARkLe
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    pHiLLip fARkLe @farkdoodle

    May 5, 2016
    SWIMFAN
     
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  11. Famous
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    Famous Pablo Picasso

    May 6, 2016
    Give us an Update!
     
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  12. XyberH
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    May 6, 2016
    Lmaoo
     
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  13. Mike Tyson
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    Mike Tyson big cuntry's alias

    May 6, 2016
    We f----- yesterday night and the night before so things worked out I guess.
     
    #73
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  14. Famous
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    Famous Pablo Picasso

    May 6, 2016
    Ahhhh so in the end you are King Ashy d-ck? And check this other thread btw
     
    #74
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  15. YungGawd
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    YungGawd #PASSPORTBOYS

    May 6, 2016
    SOOO f---ing TIGHT I MISSED THIS THREAD
     
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  16. kris
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    May 15, 2016
    LMFAO.
     
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  17. Nelly05
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    Nelly05 Ƭ̵̬̊

    May 16, 2016
    As a crazy female I can honestly say I'd do this and share it with my imaginary friends. I'm like...really immature so I'd think it was funny and think that you'd think it was too. Reading this thread im learning men don't like things like this. Noted.
     
    Mar 28, 2024
  18. Criza Malone Hamilton
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    Criza Malone Hamilton Check the birthdate. n*gga you ain't Ric Flair

    May 16, 2016
    Plus if you show your real friends these d-ck pics...them hoes gonna try to f--- the Mike tysons of the world ashy or not ya feel me. The Mike Tysons win but ultimately you'll lose



    But hit us with that ashy d-ck advice. Is that an issue or nah
     
    #78
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  19. Nelly05
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    Nelly05 Ƭ̵̬̊

    May 17, 2016
    I have never seen an ashy d-ck before in my life. But I imagine if I did I'd just spit on it and keep it movin. It's d----s that smell like piss that disgust me.
     
    #79
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  20. Dread or Alive
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    Dread or Alive Kamikaze should've been released 3 years ago

    May 17, 2016
    heh nice banter
    you f--, it means your d-ck is her throne :whylie:
     
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