Jan 25, 2020

WPG gave a postive-ish review to Eminem. Anything can happen in the roaring 20s

 

Jan 25, 2020

Eminem’s bars are picked apart, and the only thing you say about Young M.A. is she’s “inhumanly charismatic”. Well, that charisma doesn’t change the fact that her verse has all of the worst lines in the album, combined with trash delivery.

You try to hide your seething anti-stannery behind objectivism, but it falls flatter than your feelings on this album. I keep thinking I might read something by you that shows you have changed from that ‘guy who used to be a stan’, but you haven’t. Eminem still has his hooks in you, and it’s incredibly transparent through your reviews.

 

Jan 25, 2020

You’re probably that token white dope who hangs around lowlifes, and the police have marked as a snitch source. Cheddar bob of eastern PA

 

Jan 25, 2020

yeah the scores are the scores, i have nothing to do with what any other eminem album was given. i also never really think of things in pitchfork-score terms, if i'm rating an album i'm thinking 1-5 mics.

idea here was like "look, all critics have spent the decade snarkily trashing him and looking at his work through moral and celebrity terms, let's write about him as part of a stylistic lineage."

 

Jan 25, 2020

I think everyone is agreement (even the stans) that the s-----y love songs about faceless women need to stop lol. It’s kind of crazy that he’s still making songs like that 10 years after Recovery lol.

 

Jan 26, 2020

I like a b---- that like to wobble, wobble
Shake it, shake it, break it, break it, uh
n-----, we made it, made it, they hate it, hate it
Pro professional, pure persistent, I'm paper chasing
I hate complaining, I hated waiting, I'll pay for patience
But I hate to pay a bill (Hate that)
And I made a mil' without a major deal (I made that)
Yeah, her a--- fake, but she came for real (She came, uh)
Money ain't a thing, that ain't a thing for real
It's the broke lingo (Huh)
And no, ain't nothing Saweetie, this is no Quavo (Migo)
Man, I just get high, let my hoes lay low (Ooh)
I just want some face but this is no facial (Ooh)
Do right and k--- er'body, Drake mode (Hello)
b----, I'm tryna eat out, take your plate mode (Hello)
Disrespect that life and I'm in g--- mode (Grrr)
You can leave this earth, b----, I'm in rake mode (Huh)
I'm in cake mode (Huh), I'm in brave mode, uh
What up, Marshall? I'm a martian, I'm in Wayne mode (Facts)
Neck wet, big drip, I'm in rain mode (Drip, drip, drip)
Eight n----s, eight hittas, take eight souls (Brrr)
Collect pesos (Huh), and I'm paid, so? (Paid)
Self-made goals (Hey)
When the pain leaves (Huh)
Where does the pain go? (Where?)
Tip of the backwood is where the flame goes (There)
To the sky is where my brain goes (Wow)
Same pack, same fiend, sellin' the same clothes (Wow)
Pinocchio and my pistol, they got the same nose
Me and my n----s gotta eat, we share the same stove (What?)
Case closed, bodies in my lane, b----, lane closed

Anybody that defends this shouldn’t have a platform. “You can leave this Earth, b----, I’m in rake mode”. Such charisma. Magnetic.

 

Jan 25, 2020

Haven't read the review, but the score is only 0.5 higher than Revival? What?

 

Jan 26, 2020

I liked Darkness not because I was shocked by the “twist” but because I thought the comparison of Em & the shooter’s state of mind was a pretty ballsy idea to run with. I also really like the sample/hook. It all goes well together imo.

it was also just nice to hear a lead single by Em that didn’t sound like a record label forced him to make it or something. He’s at least trying to be creative on that. Making music about topics relevant today rather than rapping about s--- that happened two decades ago.

 

Jan 25, 2020

I give this review a 1/10

 

Jan 25, 2020

i would guess that this is the least smug eminem review written at a real publication since 2010 lol

 

Jan 25, 2020

pitchfork as always....pathetic

 

Jan 26, 2020

errrrrr yeahhh. He didnt shout one time in this verse :s If you dont think this is good, then I think you should definitley stop listening to Eminem. I havent found one person complain about this verse so congratulations.

 

Jan 25, 2020

yes, and the primary reason this album isn’t better is that it still lapses into that anonymous s--- like 40 percent of the time

 

Jan 26, 2020

do you seriously not think the same thing as i do about these weirdos who spend years on end on a forum angrily defending one rapper when they don’t even really care about/listen to the genre? it would be like you and i seeing one opera and then dedicating a decade of our lives to telling everyone on the internet that it was the best one, despite having seen like three others.

the people who just happen to like eminem a lot are totally reasonable; the ones like spatula are deeply disordered.

 

Jan 26, 2020

Paul is on his high horse because he’s quoted in Entertainment Weekly today, everyone. Let’s let him have his moment!