Oct 31, 2015

Let's address the purple elephant now so we can move on: I'm not upset that Eminem is not on this project. In fact, I would have been surprised if Interscope let him release a verse they wouldn't make money off. No, I'm upset because we were explicitly told he would be.

I like D12. They are talented, technical emcees and are underrated because they have spent their entire careers in Eminem's shadow. If you listen to their solo projects - particularly Proof's Searching for Jerry Garcia and Kuniva's Midwest Marauders mixtape and The History of Violence album, you would know these guys aren't just filler rappers for could-be Eminem albums. Unfortunately, most people don't bother with these projects because Eminem's involvement is minimal to nonexistent.

But that being said I, like most others, was drawn to D12 because of Eminem. So when I read on Twitter from multiple members of the group that he will be on the mixtape, naturally I got my hopes up. Then, to find out only moments before the download was made live that he wouldn't be on it after all, I felt, with justification, betrayed. The fact of the matter is that they have taken the title of a classic, yes classic, album and desecrated everything that made it so. D12 can make good music without Eminem (see "911" featuring the Gorillaz) but they cannot and should not make Devil's Night without him.

Another defining trait of the 2001 Devil's Night album are the lines that poke fun at helpless celebrities. From Bizarre's "police breakin' in my house, Li'l Bow Wow in the basement" to Proof's entire verse on "Ain't Nuttin' But Music," Devil's Night was culture's counter-culture. There is very little of that here. The most Devil's Night verse on the entire album doesn't even come from a member of the group but rather from King Gordy on the intro track "The Set Off." I've rewound a certain line probably 5 times and I'm almost positive he says "my mouth is so sore, I may choke from asslicking and eatin' out Dej Loaf."

Gordy is the Bizarre the group should have had all these years. Bizarre, himself, has been great comic relief when five other emcees get lyrical, but when it's just him, Swifty and Kuniva, his lack of any kind of talent is all too noticeable. His 60lb weight loss is commendable, but if you watch any interview done for the promotion of this mixtape, he is high in every single one. I swear to Christ on one of the songs he says "killin' all gays." This type of s--- was funny when they were in their 20s, in an Odd Future type of way (as much as I hate making the comparison) but now he's 39 years old.

The way this mixtape was promoted for the last month, it was supposed to be a D12 reunion. Instead it's another three man effort, with Mr. Porter showing up for only two songs and Eminem absent entirely. Fortunately Fuzz Scoota is gone too, and hopefully for good this time.

Looking past the initial feeling of betrayal, there are some solid moments on this project. For example, Swifty delivers an excellent closing verse on "Ledgend" [sic]. The song "100" is pretty good too, mostly because Bizarre isn't on it. This is the much hyped G-Unit collaboration, but when they said "G-Unit" would be on the mixtape, they just meant Kidd Kidd and Young Buck A/K/A the B-Squad. How can you even call this G-Unit without any of the original members?

Another standout is "Killin' It" which is starts with probably Mr. Porter's best verse ever, Kuniva, assuming a Royce-like flow spitting some gems like "I'm PS4, you're Turbografx" and ends with Royce da 5'9" himself going on a lyrical onslaught. Mr. Porter's beat for this song, unfortunately, leaves a lot to be desired.

Overall, I think D12 is at a point where they need to make a crucial decision about their future as a group. Their work feels fragmented being carried by only half the members. They either need Eminem's commitment, or they should move on from him entirely. In a 2004 interview with XXL (and yes I am reading this out of a physical copy of the magazine right now), Proof said, "The first two singles off our next D12 album gotta be without Em. If Em is gonna sit back and not tour with us, then it don't make sense for him to be driving the records directly."

True the industry landscape is not what it was in 2004, but I suggest D12 follow the advice of their fallen friend. All or nothing from Mr. Mathers. If he were no longer in the group, then every release wouldn't be plagued by disappointed and rage-filled comments on Datpiff and social media. Do not confuse this with lowering the bar. It's shaving off the bottom layer of "fans" who still see D12 as "Eminem and Friends." Without the expectation, maybe then people will finally appreciate the skill of the dirty dozen. Well, probably not Bizarre.