Jan 12, 2018

These aren't punchlines.

 

Jan 12, 2018

Its actually one of the most obvious punchlines in this thread

 

Jan 12, 2018

Eminem has never really been great at punchlines and his post-Hiatus work is filled with awful cringeworthy lines

However he has a decent one every once in awhile

I always liked the one on Untitled where he says

Time to put the math back in Mathers
'Cause I'm a f---in problem

 

Jan 12, 2018

Who forms pyramids and raps circles around square lyricists?

I think with my d-ck so - come blow my mind!

f--- it I'm the male, let her come to me.

 

Jan 12, 2018

I like that Lady Gaga / mailman bar

 

Jan 13, 2018

"You ain't gonna sell two copies if you press a double album"

 

Jan 13, 2018

Letter, come to, me, mail, sweater heat, some degree, fail

 

Jan 13, 2018

if it wasn't for blowjobs you'd be unemployed
I even make the b------s I r--- c-m

 

Jan 13, 2018

Wrong thread but whatever

What in gods name does he mean by "my d-ck is an apple, put it insider(cider)"?
What kind of r----- says his d-ck is an apple?

 

Jan 13, 2018

Same reason fab stick my d-ck in her ear because it’s f--- what you heard

 

Jan 13, 2018

“My dog thinks so to.. Look at my pedigree.. *Puppy barks*”.. lol makes me laugh every time when I hear the puppy bark

 

Jan 13, 2018

Pedigree/pet agree

 

Jan 13, 2018

Then I took a stand, went at Tan-Face and practically cut my
motherfuckin' fan base in half and still outsold you

 

Jan 13, 2018

Making sure any who battle me crawl away
Assault and battery holiday, and just when you’re thinking that’ll be all I say
I’ll start automatically calling names and rattling off fellow rappers so pardon the analogy
But I disappear as quick as Natalie Holloway
It’s my mentality all the way, I’m normally
a suicide mission to try dissin'

 

Jan 13, 2018

That definitely went over my head. Just like the prom is tomorrow line. Promise

 

Jan 13, 2018

I'm spitting my infinite supply of written bonafide
Kidding aside, critics take my little white d-ck in your eyelid like to f--- it
Switch subjects, moving on to the next one it's Ch- Chucky
Who wanna play with number one overall??

Don't be one of those who mistake me for a joke, I'm so for real
It’s what I told the phony emcee before I broke his will
Drove a drill through his skull to see his soul
Told him when I snap like a photo
He’ll get exposed like a roll of film

And from the start of it you felt like you were part of this and
Opposition felt the opposite, sometimes I listen
And revisit them old albums often as I can and
Skim through all them b------s
To make sure I keep up with my competition!

Girl, what would you do if I said your body was off the chain
And I told you I smile every single time I saw your face?
I ain't finished, b----, I meant in half, oil the blades

Flow vomits in your face, competitors fall at my waist
You spit a rhyme, I spit in a rhyme's face
So name thef time, place
To battle, b----, I'm still in that mind state
Don't make me step on you and make you wine grapes

I'm a juggernaut, you do not wanna rumble, you bomboclaats
I'll leave you stretched out like a f---in' yawn
So mow the f---in' lawn, your a----s are blades of grass
And I'm f---in' up this whole landscape of rap
The G.O.A.T. just ate eight acres, an eighth of that
Was just to make a path
And take it straight to your favorite rapper

None believers there AIN'T NONE
I even make the b------s I r--- c-m

So what's the difference between us?
We can start at the penis,
Or scream I just don't give a f---
And see who means it

I would never claim to be no Ray Benzino
An 83-year-old fake Pacino
So how can he hold me over some balcony without
Blowing his lower back out as soon as he goes to lift me?
Please don't—you'll probably fall with me
And our a----s'll both be history
But then again you'd finally get your wish
‘Cause you'll be all over the street, like 50 Cent

Slap my mom! Slap the f--- out of her!
She can't sue you, she wouldn't get a buck out of ya
‘Cause you're broke as f---, you s---, you're a f---in' joke
If you was really sellin' coke, well, then what the f---
You stop for, dummy? If you slew some crack
You'd make a lot more money than you do from rap

Figure you can diss me to jumpstart your career
I punch you in your f---ing chest 'til your heart kicks in gear

Aggravated assault, it was rap related, you activated a gunman
This game's over-saturated with junk and
You punks couldn't get a hit from a database with a thumbprint

Talkin' about I fabricated my past
He's just aggravated I won't ejaculate in his a---

An MC's worst dream, I make 'em tense
They hate me, see me and shake like a chain-link fence

 

Jan 13, 2018

Yah caught it on 2nd listen.. Was kinda surprised I hadn’t seen anyone post about that line.. Its one of my fave lines on the album

 

Jan 13, 2018

Hailie, come here, baby! Bring Daddy his Oscar!
We're gonna shove it up Ja Rule's a---
....I'll choke the s--- out of you little motherfuckin' midget
Hailie'll whip your motherfuckin' a---
...Daddy, is Ja Rule taller than me?
No, honey, you guys are the same size

hahahaha

Hey, mister, would you care to bear witness to
The a----whippin' I'm about to administer
To this a----kissin' little vaginal blister?
Stanibus, little Marshall Mathers' sister

'Bis, come on, answer me, man, respond!
Tell me 'bout the sun, rain, moon and stars!
Intergalactical metaphors from Mars!

 

Jan 13, 2018

"I let you see my dark side, but like a mic check, you got one too"

 

Jan 13, 2018

"And it's back and forth all day like Red & m---
I joke when I say I'm the best in the booth
But a lot of truth is said in jest
And if I ever do live to be a legend I'ma die a sudden death
Five mics in The Source? Ain't holdin' my f---in' breath
But I'll suffocate for the respect
'Fore I breathe to collect a f---in' cheque"